I saw a status update from a male friend that was talking about his “smokin’ hot wife”. I had to shiver-shake it off and all the images it conjured.
On the one hand, 1-2-3… awwwwww, isn’t that…. ummmm, lovely. But on the other, nooooo! *covering ears* I can’t hear you, I can’t hear you! These are dear friends we see and have a lot to do with. So, I don’t wanna know! I don’t want to hear of anyone objectified.
When this was recounted to my husband, tongue-in-cheek (ok…. only sort of) enquiring why he didn’t preface any mention of me in this manner, he retorted that it sounded like someone trying to be “in with the kidz”. Like it was something he had heard in passing on the street from a bunch of desperate and hopefuls lusting after a bit o’ crumpet. Oh, stop it. I’m very 1970′s Basil Fawlty in my pick-up lines, mmkay? It’s been a while.
Two minutes later, when I realised I had not done enough washing lately to bring any clean undies to my drawer, I resorted to my husband’s underwear. I had no choice. We had to go out for brunch. In public. With family. As I stepped into his black Holeproofs with the overly wide front gusset and taut little rear end, I enquired, “See? Why don’t you ever call me smokin’ hot? By the way, I’m wearing your scungies today.”
And Steve replied, without pause, “Good. That makes me feel much better about all those times I wear yours.”
Excuse #481 not to do washing: You miss out on pearlers like this from Steve. I love him. (but I don’t love his undies, goddamn but they are uncomfortable…*making adjustment*)
I frequently have a smokin’ hot kitchen. Courtesy of my wife. Does that count?
It does. It does count. Yay! I’m smokin’ hot. Courtesy the two English muffins I forgot were in the toaster last week. Set off the smoke alarm I was so hot, in fact.
Not ashamed to tell you that I love wearing Matt’s undies.. so, so comfy.
More power to you for that! If only I felt the same way… But alas.
Im sure you are smokin hot in his heart.Xx
Especially when I’m in my own underwear…
OMG I just snorted, now I have an image of both of you in each other’s undies – lol. xxx
On behalf of Steve and myself, I would like to offer my deepest sympathies for that.
Lol, I could never wear my husband’s undies, I wash them, I know what goes in there!
I don’t mind what goes in there, but I admit I did pause for a moment when I thought you had written “…what goes on in there”. That thought is somewhat scarier, now I give it more consideration. :s
Your husband is a keeper
I would much prefer my husband to come out with one-liners like that than refer to me as smikin’ hot (the thought makes me shudder)
[...] my husband’s quick wit. Most recently, I made people spit out their morning coffee with this visual. But at the end of this post, I want to share with you possibly the best comedy relief he has [...]